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The following are simple thoughts and ideas about handling a divorce. To have
your Questions & Answers included, please
contact
us.

"I was completing
the do-it-yourself divorce, I found out today that she contested the
divorce after the 20 days. What happens next in my state? I can't afford a
lawyer."
We do not handle legal questions and I have
only been involved in a divorce here in Georgia. An attorney? I think so many
things depend on the judge and your own negotiations and/or historical and
present situation.
Be careful what you sign. Often people get scared or feel
obligated to take or give child support. A mom and dad can talk to an
attorney about alimony, but the child custody should be split and both
parents should live in the same school district. An attorney can help but
the kids are not better with their mother or their father: kids need both
parents EQUALLY. A 50/50 parenting arrangement makes sense.
Every-other-weekend parenting is not logical. It
may be American tradition, but then again, remember that we started by
keeping women from owning property and not being able to vote. Our cultural
traditions have been illogical at times. The kids obviously need both
parents and moms should STICK dads with 50% physical custody. Child Support
is simply another way for Western Culture to make women feel like they need
a man to pay bills when that is not true. 50/50 responsibility is perfectly fine.
Alimony makes sense when it makes sense. Child Support never makes sense
unless a court, mom or dad want to cheat a child out of both parents being
equally available in their life.
Personally?
I think it helps to work directly with your spouse whenever possible to avoid
all of the legal costs associated with a divorce. If you absolutely need
outside assistance, I recommend a mediator. Often a lawyer will charge
you and your spouse hourly for changes and meetings. The whole thing is silly to me if
things can be worked out without the attorney. But there must be a
relationship of mutuality between the two of you.
Your spouse must know that you seriously want what's best for BOTH parents
AND the
kids.
We never know how things will go in this life, but I know that
the sunshine and moonlight are still free. When things get difficult it is
easy to throw in the towel or overreact. Things often work out better when we
keep a clear head.
Take Care,
Clay
Honest Guide to Child Custody and Visitation
(Paperback)
Honest Guide to Child Custody and Visitation (Digital)
(Written by a Single Dad and Founder of
Fight4Kids)
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supportive information however we recommend
professionally trained assistance if
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